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Encouragement as an Antidote to Chaos: Thanksgiving and Thanksreceiving November 30, 2025 13:50
I was driving to school a few days before Thanksgiving. It was early in the morning, it was dark, and the streets were wet from rain. The traffic lights in the distance turned green, and those green lights reflected on the wet road and stretched out along the street toward my car in long, narrow, blurry points, encouraging me along the way.
Encouragement is a practice, and it can be an antidote to chaos and uncertainty.
My husband and I went to the grocery store last Saturday afternoon—the Saturday before Thanksgiving. As we pulled into the crowded parking lot, we slowed down and stopped at the sign in front of the store. A woman pushing a cart loaded with groceries crossed in front of us. To us, it was a commonsense gesture—to stop for her…at a stop sign—to let her cross; obviously, it meant more to her, though. She smiled, waved, and blew kisses at us as she crossed and pushed her cart toward her car. We weren’t doing anything exceptional; however, sometimes it feels good to be enthusiastically, and sincerely acknowledged for doing what you’re supposed to do.
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The following Saturday (post-Thanksgiving), Jim and I went to the same grocery store several hours earlier than usual in order to beat a forecasted winter storm. Traffic was very light at 7:00AM. We had no trouble finding a parking spot, and the few shoppers in the store were outnumbered by workers stocking shelves.
The produce section was already fully stocked, which was a pleasant surprise, and we didn’t have to wait in a long checkout line.
I asked our cashier, Bri, if she had a good Thanksgiving.
“I was here,” she said, “and…I was here yesterday,” which was Black Friday.
Bri looked fatigued and discouraged as she scanned our groceries.
“I hope you had had kind and patient customers,” I offered, while bagging our groceries and placing them in our cart.
She shrugged her shoulders and added, “It was pretty crazy yesterday.”
Another cashier stopped by her register and announced that they were going to be understaffed…again. Bri was concerned that her manager would forget about her break as a result.
As Bri handed us our receipt, I said, “We won’t forget you, Bri, and we appreciate your dedication and hard work.”
Bri’s face lit up when she heard me say her name. She smiled and encouraged us to “stay warm.”
Empathy and kind words may not be enough to alleviate fatigue and frustration, but for a moment, at least, I hope that Bri felt seen and appreciated.
Sometimes, a kind word from a stranger at 7:30 in the morning on a snowy Saturday after the biggest shopping day of the year can help make the day flow a little more smoothly. I certainly hope that was the case for Bri.
***
The Saturday after Thanksgiving is Small Business Saturday, and later that day I purchased a beautiful, hand-knitted blanket from a friend’s wife who is exceptionally creative, and who is also on the verge of starting her own small business.
This blanket is circular with small, knitted roses at the edges so that when it’s folded and rolled, it resembles a bouquet of red roses. It will make a lovely gift for a special friend this Holiday Season, and it felt good to support another friend on her entrepreneurial journey.
Encouragement doesn’t only benefit those who receive it; it also benefits those who give it.
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Earlier this month, I met with one of my regular tutoring students, David. David has been struggling in his English class for much of this semester—not because he found the work of writing essays intellectually challenging, but because of procrastination. Delay, delay, delay is David’s downfall.
David would come to my office each week and stand in front of my desk. I have several chairs in my office, and most of the students I work with choose to sit in them during our meetings. David, however, prefers to stand.
He was guarded, stoic, and standoffish during many of our sessions. He was often eager to leave and rarely offered details and information without being prompted.
As the semester progressed, I’d ask him about the topics that he chose for his essays. I learned that he had an interest and an in-depth knowledge about Afro-Cuban music. He also was curious about civil rights leaders. I responded with interest and encouragement, and he continued to write and turn in his assignments.
At this point, we have a few weeks remaining in the semester, and David is very close to earning a B in his English class. The last time he came to my office, he stood in front of my desk, as usual. However, at the end of our brief meeting, he walked around my desk and gave me a hug and said, “Thank you.”
Keep in mind, I work part-time at a high school, and I often feel invisible in this role. I’m lucky if students make eye contact with me in the hallway, or smile, or even say, “Hello.”
High school kids aren’t big on hugging, so this was significant.
Encouragement inspired David to work to his potential, and his sincere gesture of appreciation encouraged me to realize that what I do does matter. It was a win-win.
***
Encouragement is an antidote. It uplifts, acknowledges, comforts, inspires, and reassures. It also propels us forward and fosters meaningful connections with others, especially during times when we are feeling vulnerable, uncertain, or afraid in a crazy, chaotic world.
Encouragement is a meaningful practice, and I encourage you to incorporate it in your own life in whatever ways resonate with you.
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Thank you for taking the time to read this month’s offering. I hope you enjoyed the Thanksgiving holiday with your loved ones.
Please check out the current Middle Moon Malas collection. These hand-knotted, one-of-a-kind designs make thoughtful gifts for meditators and wellness enthusiasts. Know that I also offer restringing services and create custom designs upon request. Simply send me a message via the Contact Us page.
I am grateful for all of you, and I hope the month of December treats you well.
In the meantime, keep practicing.
Grief, Grace, Grit, and Gratitude: A Thanksgiving Reflection November 30, 2024 14:08
If you prefer to listen to this month's offering, please click HERE for the audio link.
GRIEF:
I don’t know about you, but the month of November has been a roller coaster for me. I’ve been dipping, diving, climbing, and spiraling through all the emotions this month.
The results of the recent election were devastating and heartbreaking for me. I was really hoping and hopeful for a different result—both for my state and country—but neither panned out. I am really terrified for my students and for the future of this country. We have made a horrible mistake, and we are heading in the wrong direction. There is so much more that I could say about this, but I’m going to leave it at that for now.
As a result, this devastating loss has brought raw emotions to the surface for me, and I find myself reacting much more strongly to other, unrelated situations.
For example, when I heard about the passing of 399, the famous mama Grizzly bear that Thomas Mangelsen has been following and photographing for nearly twenty years, I broke down and sobbed.
I have been grieving her loss for weeks now. Several months ago, I watched the PBS Nature documentary, 399: Queen of the Tetons. It was a beautiful film that chronicled the story of 399 and the work of Thomas Mangelsen.
Unfortunately, 399 was struck and killed by a vehicle in late October. I hope her most recent cub, Spirit, continues to thrive so that her legacy may live on.
One of the producers of the film, Elizabeth Leiter, said of 399: “She’s the wildest woman I’ve ever met.” 399 is the oldest known mother Grizzly in the Yellowstone and Grand Teton ecosystem. She was twenty-eight years old when she died; most Grizzlies only live between twenty to twenty-five years, and she has given birth to eighteen cubs, which is remarkable. 399 is the first resident bear of the Jackson Valley region in forty years, and her presence has helped to reoccupy and recover the Grizzly population, which is also significant.
399 represents strength, resilience, protection, and independence. An inspiration to us all and an ambassador of the wild world, she will certainly be missed. The death of this beautiful matriarch is a major loss, indeed.
(This is not a photo of 399. It is a photo of a grizzly courtesy of Unsplash. Please visit Thomas Mangelsen's website for beautiful photos of 399 and her cubs)
GRACE:
Last weekend, my daughter invited me to attend the 100th Anniversary Celebration of the Sigma Alpha Iota Indianapolis Alumnae Chapter. She joined this international musical fraternity when she attended ISU.
It was a lovely event held at an Episcopal church on the east side of Indianapolis. As part of the celebration, several members performed musical pieces during this event. A young soprano named Anna began with a beautiful Puccini aria: “O Mio Babbino Caro.”
The acoustics in this church were fantastic, and I did all I could do to hold in an ugly cry while she was singing. Her performance was so moving, but I could not stop the tears from streaming down my face.
Anna sang several pieces and was followed by a professional bassoonist who played a series of movements named after gemstones: “Smoky Quartz,” “Lapis Lazuli,” and “Tiger’s Eye.” Her performance was followed by an extraordinarily talented pianist.
All of these performances were moving and amazing!
Afterwards, we gathered in the lobby of the church to chat and enjoy cake and charcuterie. Elise introduced me to several members of SAI. Everyone was so warm and friendly.
At one point, I chatted with a woman who happened to know my music teacher from junior high school. In the late 1970s, they had traveled to Europe together with a group of musicians who toured and performed in various cities in Germany, Austria, and Switzerland.
I remember my teacher, Miss Engel, talking about this trip, and it inspired the theme of our spring concert that year. We performed selections from The Sound of Music, and she projected slides from her travels during the concert.
Music has a wonderful way of bringing people together, and even though I was not a member of SAI, these women made me feel welcome.
Various scrapbooks and photos were displayed on a table along one wall. After glancing through the photos and article clippings and spending time with these wonderful ladies, it was very clear to me that all of the members who had participated over the years in this fraternity—all of those who had come before over the past century—they were right here with these present members now at this celebration.
I was honored to be a guest and to have a seat at the table with these very talented and warm-hearted women.
GRIT
One of the most important things that has helped me navigate the emotional loop-de-loops of this month is my personal meditation practice.
Daily practice has helped me remain rooted and grounded in the present moment.
I appreciate the online Dharma group associated with Sravasti Abbey that meets every morning, and I’m looking forward to the upcoming Retreat from Afar that will begin in January. If you’re interested in this, feel free to check out the Sravasti Abbey website for more information.
I also appreciate my personal Sadhana and recitation practices that I make time for every day as well as the Sunday Dharma talks in Bloomington.
Diving deeply into daily practice keeps me steady and stable in the now—it keeps the fears and anxieties at bay, and it helps me to take care of myself—to renew, to regulate, and to regenerate so that I can be of benefit to others.
GRATITUDE
Despite all the chaos and disappointments that this month has brought, I was grateful to celebrate Thanksgiving with family.
Jim is recovering from a really bad cold, and I’m glad that he’s finally feeling better. Elise and Christopher had another family gathering to attend in the afternoon, so we decided to host a Thanksgiving breakfast this year.
I had made corn muffins, cranberry sauce, and a savory Native American salad the night before. Elise and Christopher brought sweet rolls, Jim cooked bacon and sausage, and I made a quiche on Thanksgiving morning.
It was so nice to start the day with family and a delicious meal.
Taking time to reflect on what’s going smoothly—and who makes you happy is an important practice, too. It’s just as important as reciting mantra and counting beads on a mala.
Acknowledging blessings and the people you hold dear help us to navigate through the difficult times.
The beads on a mala represent the beautiful aspects of life—a safe home, caring loved ones, delicious food.
The knots represent the obstacles and challenges—worries, fears, and loss.
However, a meaningful life includes a balance of BOTH—and accepting everything that comes our way, navigating the ups and downs with an open mind and compassionate heart, allowing us to cultivate wisdom and appreciating the everyday joys that surround us.
I’m also extremely grateful for all of you who take the time to read or listen to these monthly musings.
I hope you are happy and well, and I hope your practice is helping you to navigate the obstacles and to appreciate the joys of your own lives.
Blessings to all of you!
Be sure to check out the MMM website. I have added a few additional designs, and plan to add even more in the coming weeks. Also, I don’t typically add quarter malas to the online shop, but if you’re interested in a design that I’ve posted on IG or FB, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I am happy to create custom designs (quarter malas or full malas) as well.